Follow My Sorry Ass


Thursday, January 29, 2015

First World Problems

Joe: So what should I wear to the father-daughter dance?
Elise: A tuxedo. A pink tuxedo!
Will: [Laughs]
James: Is that like "Dumb & Dumber"?

(5 min later)
Me: When did you see "Dumb & Dumber"???

--

Our dishwasher died. I got to wash a sh*tload of dishes today. And I'm all...


And then I'm like,




And I'm waiting by the phone (okay, holding my cell in my hand) to hear my 2nd beta results. Fingers crossed that they're okay...



Wish me luck on this harrowing journey.

Update: all is well!

Monday, January 26, 2015

Pretty Sure...

Sunday, January 25, 2015

Bueller, Bueller, Anyone?

Evap line??  Like, 2 hours later.

Top test is false positive from Friday 1/16, first thing in the morning.  Bottom one is today.  I know, probably nothing, but it looks like something here in person.  And yeah, my bathroom is kind of dirty.

Friday, January 23, 2015

Memes of the Day



Sunday, January 18, 2015

Ish My Toddler Says: A Proud Mama's List

*Brag Alert*

I'm kind of impressed with Zachy these days, especially because of how much he is talking.  Of course, all of my children are geniuses, but I'd forgotten how delightful it is when they start saying lots of intelligible things.

Here is a comprehensive list of the words and phrases Zach says, at age almost-17-months:

Trash
Trash truck
Daddy
Mama
Jame (James)
Wull (Will)
Eeese (Elise)
Cop-corn (popcorn)
Sishy (fishy)
Bottle
Water
Cold ice
Cold water
Side (outside)
Car
Car-car (cracker)
Doggie oof-oof (doggie woof woof)
Bye
Hi
More
Down
Ball
Cossickle (popsicle)
Nanna (banana)
Potty [maybe this means he will potty-train early!!!! Please oh please.]
House
Sweep
Go-gurr (yogurt)
Shoes
Kahk kahk (quack quack)
Baah-time! (bath time!)


In other kid-related news, school started again--grumble grumble after much too long a winter break grumble grumble--and the kids promptly took turns getting sick.  First it was Will and Elise, then Zachy (and Joe, for several days this week), and then James got it this weekend.  Fevers, nasty coughs, body aches, diarrhea.  Extreme grumpiness and laying around and moaning.  Snot ad nauseam.  I'm the only one who hasn't had a twinge of it and luckily Zach's was a pretty mild version.  But woe to anyone who comes in our house right now; you'll probably catch it just by glancing at a doorknob or something.

Oh yeah.  And Elise broke her first bone while we were at the park on the Thursday before last.  For some reason she jumped off a swing and apparently landed right arm all funny-like. She walked over to me crying afterward, cradling her forearm.  I knew she had to be hurt pretty badly because it looked bruised and swollen immediately.  Then, she got really p*ssed and started sobbing again when I told her we needed to go have it looked at, because she hates taking medicine and always suspects she'll have to get a shot.  Poor Elise.

Since Joe was at work I got to bring e'erybody along to urgent care (yep, the same local place where they gave me the false positive pee test results that one time--yay).  They actually sent us elsewhere within that system to get a cast put on it, with minimal instructions, so I spent quite a long time dragging the kids from building to office building trying to figure out where the hell orthopedics was.  By the time we finally found the right building, it was too late in the day to even do her cast because the doctors had gone home!  We got sent home with her temporary brace on until the next day.  It was a very stable break, but still.  Highly frustrating.

The bright side is that she was actually ok with ending up with a cast, it being pink and all.


Big brothers: not too terribly bothered by sister's painful ordeal.



Tuesday, January 6, 2015

Shark CPR

This is what passes for a quiet evening in my house these days.


The best part was when old bathwater squirted out onto my new-ish ottoman and the shark was declared "alive".  That, and when Will was like, "Sharks don't even breathe air!" after Joe stopped recording.

Think I'm ready for holiday break to be over.