Snippets I happened to overhear from the driver's seat of my Mom Taxi today:
"Fiona [the dog] likes to be surrounded in hotness, so that's why she climbs in Aunt Sophia's purse."
"The cafeteria burgers are either raw or horsemeat. HORSEMEAT, Mom. That's illegal."
"I was like, Jeez. Enough Olympics."
"Bob Costas? He has pink eye."