Friday, March 31, 2017

Names of Future Kardashians

My picks for future Kim-Kardashian spawn:


North, Saint, and...

(Little Brother:)
Noble
Patrician
Viceroy "Vice"

(Little Sister:)
Clarity "Clare"

(TWINS--little sisters:)
Mystery and Clarity (hah)




Thursday, February 2, 2017

Kung Poo Panda

How are you spending your winter?

I'm spending mine in front of the TV--watching a certain children's movie (Kung Fu Panda 3!) on an infinite loop on Netflix--and waiting for the poop to be ready to go into the potty.

We're in that awesome phase of the toilet learning life cycle wherein we inexplicably don't want to use any bathroom besides our own.

Not the one at school, with the potties that happen to be just your size. Not at a restaurant. Not when we're dancing and clearly in agony since we are trying to hold it for three hours during an outing.

Not in a box. Not with a fox.

Update: But there was big progress today, on this Groundhog Day of all days! The lollipop bribe is working its magic.

---

Georgie's Favorite Words at Almost 17 Months:

Down! (meaning he wants out of the high chair)
Shoe! (meaning 'put on my shoe, you idiot; I want to go outside')
'Side! ("outside!")
Book! ('read me a book NOW, you insolent woman!')
Yeah!
blankie
That ("I want THAT.")

--

"Is it p*ssing you off?" -Zach, empathically, while I was trying/failing to communicate with the lady who was working the Drive-Thru

Sunday, January 1, 2017

Maya Riviera


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qmrKXKFR_DQ&authuser=0


We went to Mexico. The in-laws brought us. It was unbelievably fun, riiiight up until we got Hand, Foot & Mouth disease from the resort pool.

And later on, when Joe was putting the GoPro video on his YouTube Channel, we discovered another oldie but goodie [video; not a montage, though] from when we lived in Seattle:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VqtAYeY28M4&feature=youtu.be [Might actually work now!]

--

"[A]ny single brain, including yours, is made up of atoms that were forged in the hearts of far-flung stars billions of years ago. These particles drifted for eons and light-years until gravity and chance brought them here, now." -V.S. Ramachandran

"Monkeys throw their poop, Mom." -Zach, in response to someone's idea that we all watch Marky Mark's Planet of the Apes soon


Wednesday, November 23, 2016

Celebrity Babies Renamed, Part Four

I think this is the fourth installment of this post; Please forgive me if there were only two previous ones.

(Clears throat) Ok.

Valentina Angelina Angelina Valentine

Dream Renee Jeannie Renee

Dusty Rose Justine Rose

Onyx Solace Odessa Solace

More to come.







Monday, October 31, 2016

Five Little Pumpkins







Deadpool = James
sumo wrestler = Will
zombie cheerleader evil cheerleader = Elise
kitty = Zach
lion = George

--

"Mommy, you smell like fart!" -Zach, ever earnest

"TRUNK or Treat? Sounds like kidnapping." -Will

"Nope, I got this." -Elise, when I asked her if she wanted me to do her hair for Halloween

"Gugget!" -Georgie, apparently fond of chicken nuggets

Sunday, October 9, 2016

October


At the pumpkin farm


At the beach

---

In October,
I'll be host
to witches, goblins,
and a ghost.
I'll serve them
chicken soup on toast.
Whoopy once
Whoopy twice
Whoopy chicken soup
with rice.

-Maurice Sendak